Alive and kicking…barely, it seems.

February 11, 2004

OK, so here’s the scoop: I feel like my game has practically taken over my life. Honestly. Not having a job to go to every day at another location than my home means I have a lot of free time to spend at home. A lot of free time and an addictive game is a dangerous combination, particularly with a theme that I have always enjoyed (Star Wars) and a quest- and goal-based system. I remember back in the days of when Diablo II was released, it was a similar problem, though much less potent. “One more waypoint,” Dan and I would say as we played, “one more level,” or “one more quest.” Of course, both Dan and I went in cycles of playing that game, where we’d play the hell out of it for maybe two or three weeks, then drop it for six, seven months at a time and wonder the entire time “Why exactly was it that we played that game so much?” Of course, we also weren’t paying for monthly access to play that game, so I have an impetus to not stop playing this game for months. It’s not a pay-how-much-you-play system, it’s a flat monthly rate, and you get charged no matter if you play or not.

But in any case, it’s practically taken over my life. I have emails I haven’t responded to yet that are probably pretty important. I haven’t been reading the news. I haven’t been talking online with people (and my friend Ben even commented yesterday when he caught me not playing “Why does it always say that you’re playing a game on your computer?”). Heck, I haven’t even taken the time every day to read the comics, which is normally the first thing I do in the morning.

Worst of all, I’ve completely neglected my responsibility as a gift receiver. That’s right, I haven’t sent out a Christmas thank-you note to someone, in particular my Aunt Barbara and Uncle Keith , who not only gave me the largest monetary Christmas present of anyone this year, but who I’m sure are waiting patiently for a formal thank you and wondering just why I haven’t been writing in my blog recently.

The thank you note goes out today, tomorrow at the latest if I miss the mail truck that sometimes comes early. I apologize for not getting it to you sooner, but I feel like I’ve been in a trance for the last few weeks. I also apologize to my readers, for I’ve been very bad about updates recently. Once a week isn’t too bad, but it harkens back to my time at school when I wouldn’t update for weeks, sometimes months at a time for no good reason. There were times before since I’ve been home that I was writing nearly every day, sometimes having to hold back at writing twice a day. It just goes to show even more with myself that I can only focus on about three things at once. I’ve always known this, but it becomes more an more apparent as time goes on.

What I mean by that is that when I concentrate on something, everything else goes into my periphery and I pay it almost no attention. Example: when I was focused on losing weight two summers ago, it was my biggest focus. My exercise and eating habits became my main focus, and lots of other things disappeared from my mental field of view. Since I’ve been focusing on the game in the last month, I haven’t exercised, I haven’t accomplished things I’ve been meaning to do, etc. Of course, with the exercise thing, that’s OK to lay off for awhile. I’m in pretty good shape now as it is, I’m still watching what I eat, and I can’t go jogging anyway. Well, at least I don’t think so. I’ve held off for long enough that I may be OK, but as I said, I haven’t really been focused on it. When I go to my Dad’s house and the game isn’t an option, I jog every day on the treadmill.

But that’s where I am now. I’m going to take today completely off from the game and get some things accomplished that I’ve been meaning to do–my belated thank-you note, finishing my book on the Rwanda genocide, perhaps even taking a jog if the sun holds. But no game. Not one minute. Tomorrow I’ll log on and stop my harvestors, then log off for the day again. I just need some time away from the game, despite giving up the goal I had in mind. I have to log on and stop my harvestors because as long as they’re running and collection resources I need for crafting, they require maintainance fees and power. If the power runs out, they stop but still need maintainace fees. If the maintainance fees run out, they start getting damaged and eventually destroyed, and that’s a bad thing. It’ll only take me maybe 30 minutes to log on, stop them and disassemble them, and log off. No sweat, and I won’t get sucked in to anything. That way I can have two days off from the game in which after I accomplish the goals I’ve laid out for myself, I’ll probably spend reading some about the game instead of playing it. Well, that’s not too bad, at least. At least I have the option of being elsewhere in the house, no?

So yeah, it’s been a week since my last update. Sadly, the only thing of note I’ve done since then was to join my Mother and my sister at the Rose Garden Arena to see Bette Midler in concert. I had to work my trip in Denver around that concert since the tickets were a Christmas gift from my Mom, and that’s why I had to come back early instead of just sticking out the possible storm in Denver and coming back late. It was an enjoyaable concert, though I don’t know much of her music at all and I mainly know her from films. I feel sort of the same way about this concert as I did about seeing Elton John when I was in high school, though that concert was a little more recognizable to me because I’d heard a lot of the music off his album that he was promoting on the tour thanks to me stil listening to the radio at the time, and I lament the fact that it wasn’t until later that I started listening to classic rock and got to know his older hits like “Benny and the Jets”, “Rocketman”, “Goodbye Yellow Brick Road”, etc–which apparently I all heard at the concert and now regret not appreciating as much as I should have. Though I suppose the odds of that happening with Bette Midler are pretty slim, with me getting into her music a few years from now. Bottom line, fun concert, something I probably wouldn’t have seen without my Mom’s intervention.

On a semi-interesting note, I’m letting my facial stubble grow for a bit, though not for any particularly poignant reason. Last time I shaved I cut my neck very badly. So badly that I can actually see quarter-inch parallel cuts where the double blades of my Gillette Sensor Excel blades sliced my neck, and so I’ve been putting off shaving again both from a fear standpoint and from a logistical standpoint of not wanting to shave over the wounds. I haven’t had a shaving cut bleed that badly in YEARS. Last time I cut myself that deeply was my freshmen year of high school, and I had the misfortune to cut myself directly over my jugular vein on my neck. It hurt SO much and it wouldn’t stop bleeding that I thought I’d actually nicked the vein, though thankfully I don’t think that was the case.

Worst shaving cut ever: same year, my razor snagged on something and left an inch-long cut on my chin where the whole length of the blade cut me. Stupid disposable razors. Between the horrible shaving cuts I’ve gotten in the past and how badly I get razor burn if I shave too often (to which my Dad always responds “That means you need to shave more often to get your face used to it,” but then my face always get even WORSE razor burn), that’s why I don’t shave every day. Plus, I’ve been told my multiple people that I’m one of the few men who can get away with stubble for several days. I don’t know if that’s because I have the facial structure for it, or because they always see me with stubble and have gotten used to it. As much as I like to look and feel of a clean-shaven face, I do like the 80’s Miami Vice look of a day or two of stubble, also.

/cue Miami Vice music

And so that’s where I stand for now. I’m sure without my game I’ll probably be writing in the next few days. Here’s hoping. Sorry about the long absences, loyal readers.

Posted in Geekery, General