Musings of a cloudy Tuesday.

October 28, 2003

There’s one feature that I kind of wish I had on my website that I’m not even sure how to implement, but it’s a nice feature that I’ve seen over at LiveJournal: a space with each entry where you can put your mood and what music you’re listening to. I guess it probably wouldn’t be too hard to throw in to each entry, but I’m lazy and I’d prefer that it be built in to my template system.

Speaking of lazy, notice how the pictures trickled off into nothingness? Well, I did take a trip over to my Dad’s for a few days to get my car fixed, and I didn’t have access to the source pictures over there, plus I’m also at a point where I have to do some actual image manipulation and real work, plus some choices to make about the format of things to come. Stupid stopping points. Yeah, yeah, I’m getting there.

I had to face my own notice of failure today as I filled out my “Umemployment deferment request” form for my college loans, saying with no hesitation of certainty that yes, I am a loser and no, I don’t have a job after five months of being home. Aargh! I wish I had some marketable skills that I could use, like knowing which lottery numbers are going to be picked. I bought a couple of tickets for the $160 million PowerBall jackpot last week, but unsurprisingly I didn’t win. Don’t you just hate buying lottery tickets and then dreaming of what you’ll do with the money, though? It’s an illness, I swear, and I try not to buy lottery tickets too often (maybe half a dozen a year, really), but when I do it’s almost an overwhealming feeling. I wonder if the addiction to gambling that people get has anything to do with that or whether it’s a deeper psychological reason. The need for money can’t be THAT strong. After all, wouldn’t it be easier to just rob a bank that gamble? Frankly, I see that as a better option. Option A: you get the money, and get away with the money. Problem solved, you have money. Option B: you get caught, and you go to jail for a few years. Less damage is done to your family than gambling away every cent you’ve saved away or can get your hands on.

So do your family a favor and rob a bank instead of pulling the slot arm.

It’s a beautiful day here today (beautiful in the sense that it’s mostly clouded over, somewhat chilly, and slightly windy, but I like that kind of thing), but I’m not taking a walk after revelation #672 that I shouldn’t strain my knee. I was in my room and I heard the mail coming up the street (in the odd way that I can hear the truck in front of the house from the back windows), so I ran down two doors down where he was stopped and I gave him my outgoing letter. Then I jogged back up to my house, and as I stopped to walk in the driveway, I suddenly realized the error of my ways: I had jogged down and back up the street. Well, not an error, really, but probably a no no. My knee felt fine, so I guess jogging 100 feet at a time is OK. Maybe I could jog 100 feet 150 times? That would be close to three miles, but it might take me longer than it used to to jog 2-3 miles. Maybe not.

I feel this desire inside me to go to the coast for some reason. I’ve been feeling it for quite some time, but as I walked yesterday and the road turned from an open road on a hillside to a more closed-in road passing through a forested area it grew stronger, so strong I even considered driving there this week. I would, too, if I weren’t expressly forbidden from doing so in the Mustang. Maybe I have a bit of lemming in me, with an urge towards cliffs and water…? I don’t know. Last time I was at the coast was when I went with my Dad to Lincoln City on our McMenamin’s run about a month ago, but we didn’t stop on the beach or anything, just passed by on our way to the restaurant. Last time I was REALLY at the coast was August of last year when my friend Heather and I walked to the end of Cape Lookout, went down to Oceanside, and took a look at the lighthouse at Cape Mears (all of which is of course documented photographically on my Cape Lookout Trip, August 19th, 2002 page). I really love going there, and if I drove over there that’s probably where I’d go. Hmmm…although I’m not really in “shape” for a five-mile hike right now. Maybe just Lincoln City or someplace. I don’t know. It’s moot since I’m not going anyway.

Tonight hopefully I’ll get together with Mike again at Cedar Hills Brewpub after he couldn’t make it last week, because I could sure use a beer or two, maybe a couple rounds of pool. Getting out is always nice.

Caffeinated mints. Too bad the tin is empty. More Penguin stuff, though.