Back to old-school bartending.

September 9, 2003

One thing I forgot to mention that happened on Saturday during our drive to Lincoln City was pretty funny. We were on Highway 22 outside Salem, the way I used to go into the city when my Mom would drop me off and my Dad would pick me up, and our entire procession had gotten trapped behind a pickup truck that just wouldn’t give up its place in the left lane. The traffic in the right lane was just as slow, and so we couldn’t go around him there. After a few minutes of following him, something fell off the back of the truck, and in the split second as it fly in the air towards the beautiful Mercedes convertible we were driving, both my Dad and I could see that it was a piece of wood about 8-10 inches long and about 3-4 inches thick. Big chunk of wood, in other words. Since we were pretty close to the truck, both of us were immediately concerned that it would hit the front of the car or the windshield, but instead, it hit the ground spinning and bounced OVER the car end over end. If I could have stood up, it probably would have at least nicked me–that’s how close it came to us. The Corvette Stingray on our tail wasn’t as lucky and it wasn’t going to bounce for them, by that time it was rolling end over end and not bouncing anymore, so he swerved to avoid it. Lucky bounce, that’s what it was.

Well, the party last night was a success. I started bartending around 4 PM and I was out there until the cleanup was going on after dark, probably around 9 PM or so. I had everything I needed set up behind the bar: white wine and “champagne” chilling, red wine breathing, a full ice bucket, beer in a cooler, and all my mixers and hard liquor in front of me. My Dad and I had carried over an actual outdoors bar from a neighbor, so it was a torso-level table while standing up with a rounded section at the back for me to stand and have full reach of the table. I also added my own touch, a glass vase at the front of the bar with a printed note attached to it that said: “RECENT COLLEGE GRADUATE, STILL UNEMPLOYED AND LIVING AT HOME. TIPS GREATLY APPRECIATED.” People seemed to like that, and it was a good conversation piece as people then asked me where I went, what I studied, what I wanted to do, that sort of thing. I ended up making almost $30 in tips, too, which was a great deal.

As the bartender, I didn’t have many responsibilities. I mainly asked people what kind of wine they wanted (red or white, then which kind of red or white) or popped the top off a bottle for them, though I did mix a few mixed drinks like gin and tonic. Nothing fancy, though, just easy ones. Then when we hauled out the champagne at the end for a toast, I had to keep opening and pouring in rapid succession since everyone had to get a glass, and there were about 80-100 people there. Maybe, I’m not sure. I didn’t get indoors, as the bar was set up outside, so I’m not certain. Towards the end of the night when people were feeling a little more free of their social inhibitions due to the copious amounts of booze I’d poured for them, I got into a couple of discussions with people. One got a little heated, though I wasn’t really saying anything, it was the other two people arguing about politics (you never discuss religion or politics when you’re bartending or in a service position like that), and the other was with a woman who kept asking me questions about what I want to do with my life, but the conversation never went anywhere. I thought she was tryind to lead me towards something like a specific job opportunity or you know, a cult or something, but but it never got anywhere near there. I think she was trying to help me, but it was mostly just frustrating. Apparently my answers of not really knowing exactly what I want to do are unbelieveable or unacceptable to some people. Really though, how many of you knew or think you’ll know what you want to do for the rest of your life at my age? Ridiculous.

I did some reading the other night that was kind of frightening. I saw that the “Church” of Scientology lost a big court case, the details of which I wasn’t familiar with, but I realized that while everyone has told me how bad Scientology is over the years, no one has ever really said WHY, so I followed the links to some of the website of people who follow Scientology (as in, people who keep an eye on it and not FOLLOWERS) and read a detailed history of both the “Church” and its founder, L. Ron Hubbard.

My sister seems to think that on some level people want what they’re getting in the “Church” because otherwise, they wouldn’t be there. I tend to disagree with that theory, though, since by that logic the Jews WANTED to be put in railroad cars and sent to concentration camps to either work themselves to death or be put there by the Nazis, because you know, they wouldn’t be there if they didn’t want it on some level. It’s the same situation with Scientology, though instead of holding your body hostage like the Nazis did, Scientology holds your mind hostage and doesn’t let go. People have been able to walk away from Scientology, but not as easily as you may think.

I have some objections to organized religion in the first place, but Scientology crosses the line. The practice of tithing was abandoned by the Catholic Church a long time ago, though the Mormons still practice it. All Churches pass the collection plates during services, it’s just standard practice. What I object to is the process of charging for spiritual enlightenment. Tithing is required in some churches, I understand that, but Scientology actually charges money for additional “spiritual” guidance. No money? Sorry, you’re out of luck. The interesting thing is, they keep adding additional levels for the people who have reached some of the upper ones–so they can bilk more money out of them, naturally.

I can’t reproduce all the horrendous stories about life as a Scientologist and lies they tell their members here mostly because there are so many, but I’ll let you judge for yourself with one tidbit of information. They moved their headquarters to Clearwater, Florida about 30 years ago, and when the mayor of the town became and outspoken opponent to their presence, they framed him for a hit and run and cost him the Senatorial seat he was seeking, and nearly his freedom. I don’t know what kind of consequences they faced, but I’m sure that several people fell on their swords like good little cultists. Clearwater, Florida is now almost totally owned by the Scientologists, and they even have their own security force patrolling the city, uniformed and all. Scary, scary stuff. If you’d like to read some of what I did, a detailed history of the “Church,” it’s practices, and the assertions of it’s founder can be read at http://www-2.cs.cmu.edu/~dst/Library/Shelf/wakefield/us.html, or you can check out one of the watch sites at Occupied Clearwater, which also has a nice FAQ about Scientology. Worth a read.

That’s about all I have for now. Hopefully I can get back on a more regular schedule of updates now that I’m settled back at my Mom’s house. I haven’t heard anything about the job in Salem, yet, though I’m still keeping my fingers crossed. I’ll let all of you know, of course. Have a good day.

Check out what I picked up for $10!